Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Unbelievably Tragic

I have watched in horror for the past two days as New Orleans experiences a tragic and horrible death of a city.

I lived there for a long time, and even though I hated much of New Orleans, I also loved much of it.

Who knows at this point how many will die? Who knows how many are in an attic, with no escape and the water rising? The Superdome is becoming a mini disaster in the middle of a larger disaster. The property loss alone is staggering.

Maybe the best solution in the end will be to raze most of New Orleans except for the downtown. Allow limited residential building, but disperse most of the population. This same thing will happen again, maybe again this year, maybe next -- but it will happen.

Things will get worse tomorrow, and the day after, and at some point, hard decisions will have to be made. If this disaster is any example of the decision-making (and it is) of the people in NO, the rest of us will have to lead them into what is the unthinkable.

Saturday, August 27, 2005

A quote worth quoting...

If you don't read Prof Bob Park's What's New newsletter every week -- you should. Go here to sign up.

The gem from this week...

THE PRINCE: WEALTHY BRITISH FARMER LOOKS TO THE MOON FOR HELP. Tormented by fears of nanorobots turning the planet into "grey goo," and poisoning by genetically modified foods, Prince Charles fights science by embracing homeopathy, coffee enemas, organic farming, and now "biodynamics," which involves planting according to cycles of the moon and signs of the Zodiac. In a monarchy you are stuck with what you get, while in a democracy we can pick the best qualified among us to lead. But it's only a theory…

Thursday, August 25, 2005

Pitty-Pat Advocates Xtian-like Assassinations

Pat Robertson, (R-InsaneXtianFundie), on his money oriented TV program, said that Hugo Chavez, President of Venesula, should be turned over to the Gatti Family men to "make their bones". Just "take him out", which is interestingly, exactly what George the Lesser said about Cindy Sheehan yesterday.

Isn't it interesting that all the fundies who whined that Muslim clerics did not condemn Muslim violence (although many did) have been totally and completely silent on Patty-Pat's display of the imitation of Jesus on his TV program?

Where was the Phat Phool Phalwell? Where was Doc Dobson? Where was that Gary Bauer woman?

Chavez played it cool. He offered to sell oil directly to the poor in America, bypassing all those greedy middlemen, and to provide millions of dollers per year in medical care to the needy in America who are not being taken care of by the fundy TV ministries (money grubbers).

Chavez wins Round One.

I haven't had so much fun since we tried to levitate the Pentagon in 1968.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Oh, geeeeezzzzzeee, I'm soooo embarrassed

Brittany is actually thinking about naming the fetus Federline after ….. ME!!!!!!

Read about it here....

While I think that Fetus and I share much the same attitude toward Mama, and life, and he sounds like he and I could do some tequila shooters at the Crazy Horse stripclub … I am disgraced that mama and whatever that thing behind the zipper is would think of that name …. I am soooooo embarrassed…….

Monday, August 22, 2005

Why you should hate George Bush

Don't Prettify Our History By PAUL KRUGMAN Published: August 22, 2005

The 2000 election is still an open sore on the body politic.

That was clear from the outraged reaction to my mention last week of what would have happened with a full statewide manual recount of Florida. This reaction seems to confuse three questions. One is what would have happened if the U.S. Supreme Court hadn't intervened; the answer is that unless the judge overseeing the recount had revised his order (which is a possibility), George W. Bush would still have been declared the winner. The second is what would have happened if there had been a full, statewide manual recount - as there should have been. The probable answer is that Al Gore would have won, by a tiny margin. The third is what would have happened if the intentions of the voters hadn't been frustrated by butterfly ballots, felon purges and more; the answer is that Mr. Gore would have won by a much larger margin.

About the evidence regarding a manual recount: in April 2001 a media consortium led by The Miami Herald assessed how various recounts of "undervotes," which did not register at all, would have affected the outcome. Two out of three hypothetical statewide counts would have given the election to Mr. Gore. The third involved a standard that would have discarded some ballots on which the intended vote was clear. Since Florida law seemed to require counting such ballots, this standard almost certainly wouldn't have been used in a statewide recount. The Herald group later did an analysis of "overvotes," in which more than one choice was recorded, but this wasn't a true recount, because some of it was based on computer records rather than the ballots themselves. In November 2001 a larger consortium, which included The New York Times, produced more definitive results that allowed assessment of nine hypothetical recounts. (You can see the results at - under articles.) The three recounts that had been most widely discussed during the battle of Florida, including the partial recount requested by the Gore campaign and two interpretations of the Florida Supreme Court order, would have given the vote to Mr. Bush. But the six hypothetical manual recounts that would have covered the whole state - including both loose and strict standards - would have given the election to Mr. Gore.

And other evidence makes it clear that many intended votes for Mr. Gore were frustrated. So why do so many people believe the Bush win was rock solid?

One answer is that many editorials and op-ed articles have claimed that no possible recount would have changed the outcome. Let's be charitable and assume that those who write such things are victims of the echo chamber, and believe that what everyone they talk to says must be true.

The other answer is that many though not all reports of the results of the ballot reviews conveyed a false impression about what those reviews said. A few reports got the facts wrong, but for the most part they simply stressed the likelihood - in some cases presented as a certainty - that Mr. Bush would have won even if the U.S. Supreme Court hadn't intervened. But even if a proper recount wasn't in the cards given the political realities, that says nothing about what such a recount would have found. The tone of these reports may have been influenced by the timing: the second consortium's report came out just two months after 9/11.

The country wanted very badly to believe in its leadership. Nobody wanted to write stories suggesting that the wrong man was sitting in the White House. More broadly, the story of the 2000 election remains deeply disturbing - not just the fact that a man the voters tried to reject ended up as president, but the ugliness of the fight itself. There was an understandable urge to put the story behind us. But we aren't doing the country a favor when we present recent history in a way that makes our system look better than it is. Sometimes the public needs to hear unpleasant truths, even if those truths make them feel worse about their country.

Not to be coy: election 2000 may be receding into the past, but the Iraq war isn't. As the truth about the origins of that war comes out, there may be a temptation, once again, to prettify the story. The American people deserve better. E-mail:

Thursday, August 18, 2005

A Warning

Remember ....

Every time you listen to Rush Limba (R-I'msuchapig)...

God kills a puppy.

Da'Dukster in more trouble

Da'Dukester Cunningham, (R-Icandoanything I want to do), has some problems with the US Attorney's office in San Diego:

The U.S. Attorney's Office has filed a secret lawsuit against Rep. Randy "Duke" Cunningham that contends he should forfeit his Rancho Santa Fe home to the government because it was purchased with illegally obtained money.

See the full story here.

Pretty fancy digs for a guy who didn't even make flag rank in the Navy and then became a Congressman, with a salary of $150,000 per year. Maybe a rich uncle died.

No evidence linking Blunt to murder of Boulis

In news stories today Jack Abramoff, owner of a fancy Washington resurant and good buddy of Tom Delay (R-Nutsac), and Roy Blunt (R- Billy'sBoyToyRoy) agreed to talk with investigators about the gangland-style shooting of his former business partner Boulis, who he managed to snooker out of $23 million.

No one suggests that Boy Toy, who got "comp" $75 dollar steak dinners at Abramoff's personal table, #40, and was listed as a "FOO", (Friend of Owner), has anything to do with the murder. Likewise, no one suggests that Ralph Reed (R-Insanextianhack), or Grover Nordquist, (R-I'mjustlookingtogetrich), who were also involved in Abramoff's schemes, had anything to do with personally pulling the trigger that sent 7 shots into Boulis's head.

The situation regarding DeLay is unclear at the moment.

Blunt's office has not issued a press statement about these developments yet.

Stand by for further information as it develops.

Monday, August 15, 2005

Bush's Crawford Vacation

George the Lesser took a bike ride with Lance Armstrong yesterday.

Between the two of them there is one good testicle.

Billy'sBoyToyRoy Lobbies for Cleanliness

It's not next to Godliness, according to BoyToy, but it does make fine profits for my wife, friends and family. And what's more important? Read about it here. Hey Boy -- smoke dope!!! It's cleaner!!!

The provision would have made it harder to sell tobacco products over the Internet and would have cracked down on the sale of contraband cigarettes, two practices that cut into Philip Morris's profits. Blunt has received large campaign donations from Philip Morris, his son works for the company in Missouri and the House member has a close personal relationship with a Washington lobbyist for the firm.

Several Republicans who learned of the November effort have privately expressed concern that Blunt pushed the provision partly because of his personal relationship with Philip Morris lobbyist Abigail Perlman. Blunt, who several Republicans said spends considerable time with Perlman, would not discuss their relationship or whether the two had talked about the provision

Perlman??? That's the name she still uses??? WTF??? Is this part of the connection to Jack Abramoff??

The Eli Lilly provision, once discovered, embarrassed the GOP because it appeared the party was using the cover of homeland security to protect a big contributor.

Yeah ... well, so what else is new? That's the way the Repugs in the House have been doing business for three years now.

In April, for instance, Blunt managed to have a provision inserted into a Senate bill, without debate, on behalf of United Parcel Service Inc. and FedEx Corp. The two companies were seeking to block the expansion of a foreign rival's U.S. operations. Blunt's son Andrew also represents UPS in Missouri, as the Wall Street Journal first reported, and the two companies have contributed a total of $120,000 to Blunt since 2001, according to Federal Election Commission data.

Fine job representing your constituents in the Ozarks, Roy. I know they are pleased with your getting rich and powerful while they try to survive a job at a chicken-plucking factory. Incidentally, are you getting some heartburn for all those free expensive lunches at Abramoff's joint -- being a "FOO" and all- (Friend of Owner) -now that he has had to report to the US Marshalls in Florida?

There is a Nekkid Porcupine Out There Somewhere

Sunday, August 14, 2005

I Hang My Head in Shame

I named this silly little blog after a guy's newspaper scribblings from years ago. Tom A. Ellis - a curmudgeon of the first rate who was longtime farm editor of the Springfield Leader and Press, and who had great fun twisting the tails of all the crazy fundies around town.

Tom and I became fast friends. He jumped all over me for writing like the scientist I am .... in other words .... booooooorrrrrring. I told him, all right wise guy, tell me how to do it right ... and he did -- like he did with many, many others.

I about fell off my chair this morning when Tom Ellis called the KWTO live radio program with Chuck Wooten (R-WakeMeUpWhenIt'sOver). I was astounded because Tom A. Ellis died in 1985. Maybe there is a doG after all.

Turns out that this Tom Ellis also worked at the paper at that time .. he worked for the morning paper. I bet he got all sorts of .... er. ... ahem .... interesting mail in his box that was intended for my Tom Ellis.

My Tom called a up-and-coming politician/preacher/soon-to-be-doctor/fundie ---- Doc Yak -- for starters.

Saturday, August 13, 2005

Missouri Inaugerations

Our now highly unpopular Governor , Matt Blunt (R-Knuckledrag), also known as Boy Runt in honor of his father, Roy Blunt (R-Billy'sBoyToyRoy), started his ill fated term on a good note.

Long noted for his devotion to nature and living creatures, he found, even in January, a baby eagle which had fallen out of the nest, and decided to take it under his warm-hearted wing. Understandably, our national emblem made a great hit in Jefferson City, and is suspected of making the decision for Runt to institute a "dress code" for State employees.

It is unclear if the cute little thing has molted yet, but downey white feathers don't make eagles soar, do they?

Thursday, August 11, 2005

Our congressman loses a lot of gloves

According to a FEC (Federal Elections Commission) report Roy Blunt (R-MO) spent $1500 on golf gloves in 2004.

After calling Highland Springs Golf Pro, who really didn't want to tell me squat, I determined that the most expensive golf glove in his shop was about $13.00.

That means Roy lost 115 golf gloves in 2004.

I lose sunglasses .. but not like this.

Hum theme song from Twilight Zone here...

I like to take photos, and like this stupid little net offering, my photos also reflect a "stream of thought" approach. In other words, I don't focus real well on one thing. You can see them - or atleast the ones that are public - by going here.

Well, I thought I would do something I thought was cute. I had taken a good photo of one of my favorite waitresses, Jennifer, from The Bar Next Door, downtown. It's a pretty good photo and she is a fine looking girl, so I put it into a flickr group called "Cool and Sexy". It got a lot of views.

But then after too many scotch/tequila/wine combo coolers I decided to put up a photo of myself that was taken by Dale Curtis at the paper for an article on blogging. It is a very good photo. Then I thought it might be funny to put it in the group "Cool and Sexy" - and let people laugh at an old man along all the topless beach pics.

It got almost a many views as any of the over 1000 photos I have up on flickr.

That worries me ... it worries me a lot.

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Teaching politics in Science Class


I have a couple of ways to get NASA TV. One is by satellite. The other is on the net.

The landing of the shuttle on the net was delayed 10 !!!!! freaking minutes !!!!


Most of the world would see it on the net .... why the delay ??? What were they afraid of showing???

I am a combination of disgusted and curious.

Saturday, August 06, 2005

Some idiot radio type said:

"News to me boils down to one word. Relevant. Talk about what matters to your audience. That may be totally different from station to station, but focus on things your audience needs to know or can be involved with. Look at how it affects who you're trying to reach. The difference between annoying interruption and worthwhile information, to the listener, is all about THEM. "what will this do for me?" Debateable if it's good or not, but that's how I believe people consume media now"

It's from this el-bizzaro website.

That comes close to the stupidest thing I have heard in a long time.

News that is selected because that's what YOU think your audience wants to hear?

How idiotic, how stupid and how arrogant can radio people get?

News may sometimes be most important when it's what we DON'T want to hear. For instance, when Billy'sBoyToyRoy is accepting "comp" $150 lunches at a Washington restuarant run by none other than Jack Abramoff ... who is going to share a jail cell with Tom DeLay for really sleazy dealings with public money.

Friday, August 05, 2005

Use of a .sig file in e-mail

A .sig file is a little automatic thingy put at the bottom of your e-mail that is supposed to do something. Some lawyers put a legal disclaimer about 300 words long at the end of theirs, other do some humor, others advertise their websites, and other have a political or religious thought. Businesses are great to use them for trying to sell you something.

Let's make it clear. A .sig file is the choice of the sender, and not the reader. The sender might have all sorts of reasons for adding it. The attitude of the sender is, "if you don't like my .sig file. .. tough ..don't read it, or just delete my e-mail without looking at it, I won't be offended, I don't have that much important to say anyway.

My Repug friends hate me pointing out what idiots the Repugs are being. Odd, since I put up with all their jokes about Monica's in the oval office for a couple of years. Hey guys ... it's now my turn.

Lesson of the day. The next time you or I want to bitch about someone's .sig file ... save breath. Advice given. Advice ignored.

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Intelligent Design?? Not!!

There are hundreds of web sites that take the modern cretinists (no, I spelled it correctly) who want to drag us kicking and screaming back to the 14th Century, to task. This was exacerbated this week when George Bush, not known for his knowledge of science, stepped firmly into a big, steaming, pile of retorical horseshit. I am usually so outraged at these people that I keep silent, but Pharyngula has said it well.

"I am a biologist. Like it or not, the Republican party is being led by religious zealots who are anti-biology, who publicly and vigorously oppose reason and knowledge and evidence in my field of study.

"This hasn't always been true, and it may not always be true (I hope), but right now and right here, it is inarguably the case. I will not throttle my criticisms of the despicable gang of anti-intellectuals who run this country because it might irritate all those millions of people who voted for George W. Bush; they were wrong and he is wrong and it is my responsibility as a scientist to oppose ignorance, especially ignorance that has power and influence. Let them find comfort and forgiveness for stupid mistakes in their religion, because I sure as hell am not going to give it to them.

"Don't tell me to be dispassionate or less unreasonable about it all because because 65% of the American population think creationism should be taught alongside evolution, or that Americans are just responding to common notions of "fairness". That just tells me that we scientists have not been expressing our outrage enough. And yes, we should be outraged that the president of our country panders to theocrats, faith-healers, and snake-oil artists; sitting back and quietly explaining that Bush may be a decent man who is mistaken, while the preachers are stridently condemning all us evilutionists to hell, is a damned ineffective tactic that has gotten us to this point."

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

The 10 worst in Springfield

10. Hammons Field. After running people out of their homes using eminent domain, the city sells the land to John Q. Hammons, who has never seen a public treasury that he didn't covet. What do you get? $7 Parking, $5 beer (no selection, Bud products only -- if you want a good beer go to the Brewing Company), and small $3 bags of some stale peanuts - inedible. Another reason why professional sports suck.

9. All movie theaters -- except for the future Moxie. Outrageous ticket prices. Movies made for idiots or fundies in Springfield, stupid prices for popcorn, and armed guards at the door to prevent a Snickers bar from sneaking in. Need I say more?

8. KWTO AM -- Must have some redeming qualities because business still buys ads on it, but it's not the ratings. The lamest programming this side of the new Brittany Spears TV show. Billy Long fitting in 18 commercials in a 30 minute period and Bonnie Bell doing some sort of Valley Girl talk imitation. So incessantly in-your-face right wing that Bill O'Reilly got an amplifier for his butt plug to drown out the noise.

7. The Springfield News-Leader. New motto, "No news is good news"

6. Steak and Ale. The perennial winner of the Springfield Magazine "Best Resturant". Merely proves that people in this berg have (a) no taste, or (b) don't shop for their menu ingredients at Sam's Club.

5. Harlows. A warm and inviting combination of surly and rude waitresses and hillbilly fare cooked badly.

4. Any joint that calls itself a "Gentlemen's Club". I might rate them higher if for no other reason that they piss off all the fundies around town. But I am not into tattoos, police-designed costumes, or the incessent begging for money for the jukebox. One crazed fundie used to picket a place called "The Crazy Horse" (with far less class than the one in Paris), until someone tipped him off that it was owned by a Hells Angels-like biker club. Since he had had his Thorazine that day decided not to bother their business any more ....

3. Walmart. All the color, noise and ambiance of a NASCAR grandstand with the added benefit of seeing every overweight goober in the Ozarks yelling at the kids. Wonderful shopping experience, if you enjoy Texas Chain Saw Massacre movies.

2. hOOters. Has got exactly two things going for it. Eye candy -- not too filling but not very satisfying either. And it's located close to the Nature Center where you can cleanse your soul with a long hike.


1. Any bar on Commercial street where Vietnam Vets or wanna' be's hang out. If you are into weepy old drunks who lie a lot -- just the places for you.


The Ozark Empire Fair.

Deep fried Twinkies.

One water fountain in 95 degree weather.