Friday, September 10, 2004

Identifying a Radio Shithead

First question --why bother?

I have known a few of these local radio types in my life, and I can identify one a block away. They drive an '85 Chevy with about two dozen stickers for whatever radio station they work for today, (covering the two dozen stickers for the stations they worked for yesterday). They are wearing clothes that came directly, brand new, and pre-washed, from the shelves of Sister Marie's Clothe the Homeless outlet. They wear wool caps in the summer ... geeeeeeezzzzzeeee, even Wolfman Jack dressed like a human being.

Soap is not on the grocery list. If you don't believe this, just walk into a radio studio, after the local talk DJ has left. The words that come to mind are, Gag a Maggot. Need you ask why they are never seen with a date?

They actually think they are both smart, and important. That, of course, is why they are so highly paid. Even the bobblehead on local TV news is smart enough to make a good living.

But to prove that even the lowest human form can have a little place of power under the sun they do exercise what little they are given .. this is particularly apparent in AM talk radio. They control the mute button on the console. And they can kick the cat when they get home.

HEY!! I didn't say it was important power ... I said it was what they got.

They actually think that they have some sort of doG-given right to be censors. They swagger around more than Goering with his Field Marshall's Baton, saying .... "I can cut you off asshole listener" (I wonder if that explains the local talk radio station rating 15th in a market of 20 stations -- but I digress). It's a small power ... but it takes the place of having a real life with daydreams of becoming propaganda minister for the grinning chimp we have appointed as pResident in Charge.

They have a website here. If you are into so-called adults whining it's a great place for a few laughs. But don't dare post anything there that has the tiniest bit of wit or real humor. The list-furher has a dim view of anything that makes him look as stupid as he is and will remove it without a word of explanation -- just because he can. But if you are smart, you can post something while this 13 year-old with a keyboard and a dial-up connection is hanging around the water cooler bragging about that great pipe he smoked last night. At least 50 people will be able to read it and get the point (HAHAHAHAHAHA --- did I actually say that? HAHAHAHAHA) before he can delete it.

For a photo of a typical talk radio DJ, click here

My pal Ron Davis had a radio show once. They hated him. He was everything they arn't. Smart, funny, well-informed. In other words, someone who made it thru the third grade.

They finally censored him.

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