Sunday, January 22, 2006

How Stupid can Conservatives Be?

Pretty damn stupid ... and they don't even need to be named Chuck Wooten.

Out at UCLA, an Infant Republican is determines to root out libruls in the faculty ranks. Can't have any of 'dem commies. So, he offers $100 bucks for tape recordings of Profs saying things like there are starving children in America, or 40 million people will die of AIDS in Africa. These don't reflect conservative values.

Well, smart Profs have ways to get even with obnoxious students, and most Profs are pretty tolerant, because students should exercise their brains, and question stuff, but it can get run into the ground.

Here's what I would do:

Dear Parent of Simple Susy:
As you might recall, you paid $450 dollers to MoSt for Susy to take a three hour course in Advanced Mind Warp by Lefty Teachers. I am sad to tell you that the course was too challenging for her academic skills. I noticed that in class she would write furiously every word I would say, and yet when time for a quiz came along, she would not have the slightest idea how to answer the questions, that is, if she showed up at all.

Susy decided to drop the class on the last day, avoiding a grade that would have ruined her fine 3.7 GPA to date. However I must inform you that your $450 is non-refundable. The good news in that she has proudly announced that she has an extra $100 in her pocket and is looking forward to her sessions at the tanning parlor. She says she will look really "buff" (whatever that is) the next time that hunk Arnie visits the campus.

Since part of my duty is to cousel students and parents, I feel obliged to suggest that Susy might be better suited for night courses at a local community college, while she carries on her day-time education at Hamburger U.

With sincere concern for the Conservative Youth of America,

That nutcase David Horowitz thinks this is a fine idea. So does that man, Ann Coulter and that Gary Bauer woman.

Everybody else has run for cover in embarrassment.

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