Be Fearful America .. and Don't Forget to Vote Repugly

I have a question for the TSA and Der Faderland Security.

Since I can no longer bring my lipstick gloss on the airplane, and my breast milk has to pass your taste test before I board ... I have another question about what I can bring on an airplane.

I have size AAA boobs. So I buy bras (I don't know why) with gel implants in the bra. There are two of them in each bra (except for the Critic's ex-wife who has three - an additional one right in the middle), which means I can bring on two of the three ingredients needed for my bomb. (The Critic's ex can do it alone.)

So are you going to inspect my bra, and maybe cop a little feel of my AAA's? About as much fun as watching Paris in a sex tape taken by infrared.

Oh, and I almost forgot about my Dr. Scholl's. Usually I am gellin', but I won't be smilin' if you are denyin' my upliftin' and takin' away the swellin' of my nubbin'.