My New Living Will

LIVING WILL:

I, __________________________, being of sound mind and body, do not wish
to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances should
my fate be put in the hands of pinhead politicians who couldn't pass ninth-grade
biology if their lives depended on it, or lawyers / doctors interested in simply
running up the bills. If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for
at least one of the following:

______ Glass of wine ______ Margarita ______ Martini ______ Cold Beer ______
Chicken fried steak and cream gravy ______ Mexican food ______
French fries ______ Pizza ______ Bowl of ice cream ______ Cup of tea ______
Chocolate _______ Sex_______ Access to the newsgroup alt.necrophilia.royal-family _______ a backdoor to Brittany Spears e-mail ________ The flickr group "Beach Girls"


It should be presumed that I won't ever get better. When such a determination is
reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull
the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a day.